acrimony

I'm so angry and hurt and about a million other things. Every time i think about anything i just get a rush of emotions and get confused. I feel really lost. I haven't felt this way in ages. I have so many things i need to do. So many thoughts. I cant control any of it.
Yesterday my car broke down in the middle of the road at a traffic light. I wanted to cry. It was really embarrassing, coz everyone kept asking if i needed help. And i was really worried about what was damaged. I was scared someone would hit my car coz i was in the middle of the road waiting at the light and it wouldnt start. This incredibly gorgeous guy came over and asked if i could move my car. Lol he was so cute.. I drove it down to the hungry jacks and he walked over and looked at it. Even though by that time my mum was there as well. He turned out to be a mechanic and he told me that i had a hole in my radiator. hehe i kinda think that he was lookin for a job but it was still very nice. Anywayz my dad brought my car home this morning and im gettin a mechanic to fix it tomorrow. Argh but it probably wont be fixed till about tuesday. This whole day ive just been really upset about my car. These past few weeks my car has been getting "sick". I think someone jinxed it, probably me. I kept sayin how even though it was ugly atleast it worked. But my bumper bar is fallin, my left blinker doesnt work, my car fills up with water on the right passenger side floor, my speedo hardly works, my cd player wont play my cds and now i have a hole in my radiator. Lucky i had today off work.
Today i had no work. Thats why ive had alot of time to think and dwell and get angry. Im waking up to whats happening around me. Ive been avoiding alot of things. Work has kept my mind off life. I have so much things to do before Christmas and i don't know where to start. I need to go to the doctor and get that thing off my face. Heaps of people have noticed it now and im getting really self conscious about it. I also need to get my second cancer shot thing and get my ear checked up from last time when i didnt go back. I have to go to the dentist. I need braces. I need to make appointments at my beautician for various waxing and my fake tan that i wanted to get. I need to get my hair done. Either straightened permanently or styled or wateva. Plus my sisters bday, i need to help organise that and get her a pressie. Not to forget xmas either. And then there comes around new years and i need to plan that.
I need to figure out whats going on with my family. Coz atm im not liking and have this anger toward some of them. Why do people turn around the anger to make it your fault. I know im not the only one who sees what she does but why am so annoyed? why do i care? grrr i hate it.
Catharsis - the purging of the emotions or relieving of emotional tensions, esp. through certain kinds of art, as tragedy or music. I need to vent.